What To Do If You’re Feeling Suicidal

We often feel suicidal when the stress, worry, or pain in our lives feel greater than our coping resources. 

If you're feeling suicidal, here are some ways of reducing the pain and increasing your ability to cope:

Addressing the root of the problem: Sometimes it can be hard to know why we feel the way we do. There are usually underlying reasons for our thoughts and actions. They could be about things that have happened in the past or habits and behaviours we’ve learnt over time. Sometimes, it takes a little work to untangle these things, which is why counselling or therapy may be helpful. Little problems and anxieties can build up and make us really low in mood without realising. It helps to have someone you can tell your thoughts to.

Or, you may find counselling or therapy isn’t helpful, and that’s okay too. Sometimes it doesn’t work for everyone. But perhaps it’s the relationship with your counsellor that isn’t working. It might be helpful to take a break for a while or try someone else.  Your counsellor may refer you for another form of therapy that may suit you better.

Writing a Journal: Journaling is simply writing down your thoughts and feelings.  When experiencing painful and overwhelming emotions, our brains can become jumbled and confused. Words seem to spiral around, thoughts become unclear, and knowing that we’re stressed can make us feel even more stressed. Taking the time to put your thoughts down on paper can be really helpful.

Try not to focus too much on what you’re writing. It doesn’t have to be neat, or make sense to anyone else. It’s best to allow whatever is in your mind to flow through your arm, into your hand and onto that paper. It can feel weird and awkward at first. You might even be surprised at what you come out with.  All you need is a pen or pencil and some paper. If you feel more comfortable drawing than writing, you could also try to draw or paint some pictures.

Making a Mental Health First Aid Kit: When we’re feeling anxious or overwhelmed, it can help to have things that help us feel calm and safe – like a type of mental health first aid kit.

It’s about doing things, and using objects / activities that help us to feel better in the moment. When making your kit, you might want to consider:

• Touch – objects that feel nice or comforting, like a blanket, small toy, smooth pebble, or stroking a pet.

• Sight – photographs, paintings or views that you can look at that remind you of being loved, supported and safe.  Also, watching a favourite programme or film can help.

• Smell – Different smells can help us to relax and feel calmer. This could be a candle, essential oil or favourite food. Strong smells can also help pull us out of difficult feelings and to focus on the present moment.

• Taste ­– Having something different to taste in your mouth at times of stress can be a helpful distraction, getting you out of your head and into the moment, for e.g., strong mints.

• Sound ­– Things like favourite songs, playlists, audiobooks, or podcasts can help soothe and calm. Download these in advance so you have them ready for difficult moments.

• Activities to distract ­– Make a list of activities that you can do to help distract you and bring joy in moments of distress. Things like puzzles, drawing/colouring, knitting, playing an instrument.

Setting goals: Having something in the future to look forward to can help make your mood feel better and help you feel motivated. It could be booking a really fun activity you’ve never tried before, catching up with your friends online or via video calling, learning a new skill, or even something as small as watching your favourite Netflix series at the end of a long day. Whatever it may be, having something to look forward to can help you get through the bad days.

Setting goals can also help you imagine a bigger and brighter future. Whether those goals are career-oriented or not, trying to look ahead can give you a sense of stability and calm feelings of anxiety about the unknown. You might find it easier to make small goals for the coming week and work towards these one step at a time.  Try not to get disheartened if you can’t achieve a goal straight away. Just try again when you are ready. 

Routine: Establishing patterns helps in the long run. But it begins with getting a sense of your current daily routine and noticing what helps / doesn’t help you feel better. For example, you might notice that endlessly scrolling through Instagram before bed leaves you feeling negative about yourself. So, you might decide to not look at your phone for the last 45 minutes before bed and instead read a book, or have a relaxing bath. It’s hard to force good habits, but it can do wonders for your overall mood.

Remember that you are not alone: You are not alone; many people either have experienced or are currently experiencing feelings of anxiety, depression or hopelessness, even if they don’t show it. Just know that sometimes we want a bad period of life to end rather than life itself.

Talking and Seeking Help

Whoever you decide to talk to, please remember that you are not alone.

Have you have hurt yourself, or think you might be about to hurt yourself?  Call 999 now.